school

So I decided to look into going back to school. I think this would be great for me. I will be able to do something with my life. I don't want to do accounting so I would have to do something else. I think administrative assistant would be a good fit for me.

Well, I find out tomorrow what will happen next for me. Hopefully, all is good and they say that I can go back to school.

New Meds

My doc changed my meds today. I've been having a really hard time lately. Alot of suicide thoughts and wanting to cut. Lots of visions and voices. Urges to spend, spend, spend. Really depressed. Feeling really sick right now.

He put me on abilify and lowered my risperdal and kept my prozac the same. I am hoping this helps.

I am worried about how it will affect my diabetes. One of the side effects is raising blood sugar. My doc said I should be okay. He said it is better than the meds I am on right now.

God Bless Dad

Well, got some mail today from my dad. He sent me a new necklace and a pair of earrings. He is in Afghanistan. I miss him very much.

My 5yr old was upset cause she didnt recieve anything from grandpa. I tried explaining to her that he will send her something at a different time. She was not satisfied with this answer and started crying stating that grandpa doesn't love her.

I looked up "Sept 11, 2001". I showed her the pictures of that devastating day. I explained to her that Grandpa is fighting to protect our people so that doesn't happen again. I told her if he didn't love her he wouldn't be over there fighting to keep us free. She doesn't understand but she is beginning to understand I think.

Just because

today is a good day....maybe

I slept most of the day. I was so tired. The baby must have been really tired too cause he slept all day too. School is almost out. We already know that Hannah has been held back in third grade. Nikki and Bekka should be being passed ahead.

The baby is doing really well. Wish he would learn how to walk but I guess it just isn't time for him to do that right now. He is 13 months but they say he may be delayed cause he was born a month early.

When you look at where you are in your life, are you "behind"? Ahead? Right where you want to be?

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